The Katzenklavier

Alright!

As you may have noticed I've been away for longer than the usual.

The truth is I've been on an undercover  weird fact-finding mission deep in the amazon!

On a quest to bring you the bat-shit craziest stories on the internet!

But that has nothing to do with the one I'm about to bust out now.

 Me undercover fact finding in the Amazon

Eons ago in the 1700's mankind was still an underdeveloped Neanderthal when it came to music taste. The music of the era was a result of what can only  be described as the union of the bastard children of Pink and JayZ marrying the love child of Britney Spears and Taylor Swift.

I'll let you decide who wears the pants in that relationship. and by pants I mean strap-on

Then out of the darkness, one man stood out! One man brave enough to try the unthinkable. To go to such great lenghts in the name of music. To attempt what many had called madness!

  What the Fuck!

No not cow milking! (though I can imagine that taking up a spot on the bazella w riz of the 5000 BC's)



That man came up with the Katzenklavier!

What the Fuck!

Unsatisfied by the un-organic low cruelty tones of the Piano this man decided that he wanted an instrument that gave him the closest link to nature. So instead of making love to road-kill like the rest of us, this guy collected cats and made them sing for his pleasure.

Trapped in a wooden box the cats had their tails put under the piano keys, and whenever the musician pushed a key the corresponding cat would "sing" its note.I like to think that the he originally had little guillotines instead of the piano keys, and that he chopped off the tails and replaced the cats after every performance.

In many ways we've really come a long way since then but sometimes as I stare at the Katzenklavier poster above my bed I wish I could go back to the time when things were just so much more bad ass.*sigh*

I guess I'll just have to use my Imagination and listen to Mariah Carey tracks. heyo!


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