Monday, July 27, 2009

Update from the heart of the IMUN

Holy great Potato tits.

I won't be posting pictures from the vault bt I just got away for a bit to type this out. Ignore spelling mistakes as it's hard to type while in a bathroom stall without incurring suspicion. "that's not keyboard strokes that's just my shit!".

Anyway so we were at the opening and when I think we're going to have a speech by Ghassan Mkhaiber, some 12 random hot chicks with caracalla walk in and start to dance and shit. Apparently It was a dabki thing but all they did was shake their hips and wave their fake plasdtic violins. You can see how this was awkward as we are all wearing suits and sitting in a formal setting, it became especially awkward when Tarek Mitri in a drunken stupor walked up to the stage and started waving 5 dollar bills at them. Jeez! Obviously the organbizers hadn;t thunk this through. We had to sit for 10 minutes as we were assaulted with an array of tits hips shaking tits and asses and colourful ribbons! I felt offended that they actually showed us a show reserved for the black stallion in Mkalles for the dirtiest of old men. What was more these 34 different nationalities which the speaker proudly mentioned to be present now think that lebanese dancing is done by all blonde ukranian girls and one single lebanese mom with bleach blonde hair and fucking killer abs, and that lebanese entertainment is basically crass and vulgar, this was a fucking UN conference on cultural tollerance dickwads! What the fuck were you thinking. Etiquette clearly states that strip shows should be reserved for the closing session after 6 pm not at 11 am when I;m still tryuing to hold down my breakfast after I had all that fucking croatian alcohol from last night.

Anyway I miss you guys, and This place is a lot of fun, I'll be back soon.


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